Because the best thing about being underemployed right now is going to the movies on a Friday morn..

...I saw Watchmen today, all by myself. Literally. I was the only person in a 300+ seat theatre. My spoilerific thoughts coming up afer I guess Adrian Vedit's computer password.

The best thing about it, and conversely the worst thing, is that it changes/exorcises some key plot points from the graphic novel. They wisely changed the part of the ending where Veidt's evil plan to unite people in fear--and therefore avert WWIII between the USSR and USA--was unleashing an alien on NYC and killing millions of people. In the movie, they altered the means from alien to framing Dr. Manhattan, which was a wise move in my opinion because I found the alien reveal to be somewhat cheesy and having Veidt frame Dr. Manhattan has more emotional resonance and less giant alien-brain-mutant-tentacle-thing. So props for that.

On the flip side, they still had to exorcise large-ish chunks of the graphic novel in order to not have the movie clock in at 5+ hours in length. A lot of this is at the expense of character development, specifically Silk Spectre and Rorschach. I found the truncated Rorschach backstory hurt his character because it didn't give a clear enough explanation of why he became the sort of uber-crime-and-punishment vigilante-justice-wielding borderline sociopath he became. There were only a couple of flashes to his childhood--at least they kept the part where he bites off a piece of one tormentor's face (charming)--and no mention at all of the infamous Kitty Genovese indecent in the mid-sixties that spurred him to don his Rorschach alter-ego. All that said, Jackie Earl Haley was a superb choice to play Rorschach. Even though most of the movie has his face covered in the Rorschach mask, his physicality and his raspy-gravelly voice is exactly what you'd imagine Rorschach's to be.

As for Silk Spectre, the reveal of her bio-dad (Comedian) and her acceptance of it is so slam-bang fast as to almost give me metaphorical whiplash. Her truncated backstory did nothing but hurt the character. And of all the Watchmen, she comes across as the flattest, which seems counter intuitive since she got more screen time than most. I think a lot of that had to do with Malin Ackerman herself. She just looks too young to be playing someone in her mid-thirties, and unfortunately her performance didn't do enough to overcome that. I had the same problem with Matthew Goode as Adrian Veidt (Ozymandias). He just looks too young and too--I don't know, slight?. He's a good looking man, no doubt, but the character is someone who is sort of classically handsome, a kind of all-American ex-football jock type. He has brains and brawn. Goode really only has brains working for him at the level he needs for this role. And the weird, vaguely German/English accent did nothing to help. That was probably the most distracting thing in the whole movie for me.

As for the rest of the Watchmen, Jeffrey Dean Morgan brought just the right amount of sadistic glee to the Comedian, Patrick Wilson as Nite Owl proved it is possible to make a pretty man look convincingly schlubby with prostheses, and Dr. Manhattan's almost complete detachment from humanity is right in Billy Crudup's wheelhouse. And yes, you do get several shots of Dr. Manhattan's glowing blue junk. And his fine, fine derriere.

As adaptations go, this was a pretty good one. Director Zack Znyder is a professed fan, and you could tell. There were many scenes in the movie lifted directly from the pages of the novel, right down to each "a" or "the" from the original dialogue. Film is a different medium that comics. It just is. Where in the comic you can linger on a panel or page and have pages and pages of extra material not directly tied in to the action in the panels, a movie is always moving forward to the finish--and will get there in under 3 hours, preferably. As I understand it, much of the extra stuff from the comic--the comic-in-a-comic, the magazine excerpts, news clippings etc. will be included as extra features in the DVD. Which is nice, because it does a great job of putting the action in a much richer, colorful context. It's just too bad there couldn't have been more of it in the actual movie itself. But you could tell he wanted to cram in as much as possible, which resulted in some very compelling visual story telling. Perhaps the best example comes right at the beginning when we get an introduction to this parallel universe by way of a montage of significant historical events from the '40s-'70s if superheroes had been there. This was adaptation at its most effective.

I enjoy the graphic novel quite a bit--it's long and dense and begs repeat readings to peel back the payers. The same is true of the movie version. There is simply too much going on to be able to absorb it all in a single viewing. I'm just concerned people will decide it's not worth their time--it's about an AU where not-very-popular superheores are real and just as fucked up as normal people--or they'll see it and be disappointed that the ads misled them into thinking it was going to be a nonstop action-fest bloodbath. And that would be a shame. Because as comic movies go, this was definitely one of the more original and interesting takes on the genre and I would hate for this to been seen an epic fail (a steep drop-off in second weekend ticket sales will tell) and result in more dreck like fucking Spiderman 4.




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Spoiler alert.

This post contains spoilers for the most recent episodes of BSG and Lost, so click through at your own risk.

TV Thoughts: BSG "Someone to Watch Over Me"

I would have more to say, but when I watched the episode, I was nearly falling asleep and knew I had to be up about an hour before the asscrack of dawn the next day. So just a few thoughts this time, though I really did enjoy the episode. It was certainly one of the best Chief showcases of the series, and I loves me some Chief. I really felt for him when he found out he'd been played by Boomer. And man, is Boomer a manipulative bitch. I don't think I've ever truly hated her, but this episode really made me hate her--emotionally screwing with Chief like that, taking advantage of Helo's susceptibility to the Eights like that, and making Athena watch! Bitch! As far as the Starbuck stuff goes, that was also good. I felt pretty confident by the end of the second act that the mystery piano player was ghost!Dad or whatevs, but I enjoyed their chemistry anyways because at this point, I don't care much about the plot as much as spending time with these characters before it's all over. I love that they are really incorporating the musical score into that character's lives. The Gershwin-influenced score this week was really an auditory treat; plus, I felt a cut above average for being able to identify that even before I read Bear McCreary's blog post on the episode.

TV Thoughts: Lost "LeFleur"

I'm loving Lost these days--LOVING! IT! This Sawyer-centric episode was by far one of my favorites of the season, and possibly the series. Last week's Locke-centric mission to reunite the Oceanic 6 band was great, as many Locke episodes are, but this was had that extra something that kept me glued to my sofa. Sawyer screen time has been in short supply recently, so maybe that's why I loved it so much--Sawyer clearly gets the best dialogue, and as a bonus we got to see him with clean hair--something we haven't seen since sometime in season 3. This episode really felt like a breather--there really wasn't a whole lot of plot momentum, other than getting an extended look at life in the Dharma Initiative during their heyday in 1974, until the end, and the rest of the hour was filling in blanks and spending time with the no longer time-traveling-sickened left-behinders. There wasn't a lot of Daniel, but what there was packed a wallop; Jeremy Davies really knows how to sell distraught and quasi-catatonic. Miles got to be a smart-ass and just generally be Sawyer 2.0. Jin's English improved! As did his hair. But the heart of the episode belonged to Sawyer and Juliette. They are teh cute! I really like them together. Of course, as soon as he gave that spiel to Horace about how three years is enough time to get over someone, it was obvious that the next development was going to be Kate & Co. getting zapped back to the island. All of that being said, the gaspiest part for me was getting that frustratingly brief glimpse of the Four-toed Statue (I'm just guessing but come on, that's pretty much a gimmie) back when it was A Whole Statue. Cuselof, you bastards!!




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Eat it, tax man.

Nothing makes me feel as frustrated, pissy, rageful (as in full of rage--it's a word now, damn it!), old, or mentally deficient as filing my tax returns. Especially the R.I.T.A. part; if you have to that where you live, you know what I mean. I hate that they makes you pay based on what your estimated income is for the next year or some such bs like that. HATE. The rest of it isn't so much evil as it is loooooong.




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Shooting the shit. Not eating it.

This may be of interest only to me, but I figured I'd share it here because extra publicity never hurts. My cousin--well, cousin-in-law or first cousin by marriage or whateverthefuck--Kelly and her friend Kristina are starting their own humor blog: Two Girls, One Site. Their first real post will be an Oscars liveblog tomorrow. I know, I know, who needs yet another Oscars liveblog, but I can personally vouch for Kelly's comedy cred. And if her friend is anything like her, I'm sure she is awesome too. They don't have any full posts up yet, but if you want a taste of their styles then read their bios--good stuff.

Yay Kelly! You are going to be internet famous one day, and I can say I knew you when. Before you were just crazy, now you are crazy and publishing it for all the English-speaking word to see. I think I'm getting a little verklempt. Tear.



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TV Thoughts: BSG "Deadlock"

Previously on BSG: Downloading makes Ellen tens times more awesome than she ever was.

Hi, Hoshi! I still want to give you a hug.

Now that Ellen is back, I think things might get a bit uncomfortable in the Tigh household.

I love that Ellen uses alcohol as a way make the others feel comfortable with her. Hee.

The president's face says it all: must get out of here!

Eww, did not need to see the eye socket.

Look who comes skulking back, good old Gaius. And at least one of the harem is skeptical of him. Good.

Abandoned--who,wha? I'd never say anything like that...pshaw!

Mental porn! Awesome.

"Just don't anybody unplug anything." Doc Cottle, I think I will miss you most of all.

Aww, poor Ellen. No baby mama-ing for you.

It is reassuring that those two are just as snipe-y now as they've always been.

Hot and vulnerable lady, sing! Regularity, Gaius, regularity.

Good thing Laura didn't want to be a PI because subtle she ain't.

I just love how ridiculously human the cylons are.

It's getting all Oedipal up in this bitch, what with the robot ladies and creator/created relationship.

They may be taking away the food but at least he managed to snag a couple beforehand, Gaius that bastard.

Tigh times two with Bill and Saul now. Jeeze, I think between the two of them they'll deplete the alcohol reserves fleetwide.

Saul's drunk laugh is all kinds of hilarious.

Good thing the resource shortage doesn't extend to votive candles and decorative tapestries.

"And guns! Bigger guns!" Best line of the so.

I guess the baby will keep Saul from answering to Ellen's accusations that he had a bigger (metaphorically speaking) boner for Bill and the ship than either of his ladies or baby. How convieeeeenient.

Not show related: I think the Snuggie had gone from bad to awesomely bad to ironically awesomely bad and is now just plain annoying and hideous.

Quit fighting, Daddy and not!Mommy !

Oh Saul. Wibble.

You do good deeds and you are rewarded--with guns!

It is criminal that Michael Hogan hasn't at least been nominated for an Emmy. And he likely never will. Which just sucks.

And today's lesson is skinjobs are people too. Warm fuzzies.



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TV Thoughts: BSG "No Exit"

Previously on BSG: no more possibility of Geata and Hoshi saving the world with math. Woe.

Ellen's transition from losing her shit to calmly getting out of the goo tub--I think I have a bit of whiplash.

"Its a bit cold in here." "I'll get you some clothes; I've seen it all before." Mwah!

There's brain surgery all over the damn place this week on TV--Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice, and now BSG.

Just thinking of all the layers: Ellen made Cavil to look like her father and then she was screwing him on NC even though she had no idea what she really was and...gah! That gray matter is my 'sploded brain.

"What about the swirl? Had he taught you that?" Ellen, you still a saucy bitch!

Oh Lee, the lady doth protest a bit too much.

Eww, was it too much to ask a cleaning crew to clean up the arterial blood spatters?

So is Kara the heretofore nonexistent 13th cylon?

My brain hurts!

Man. Cavil's hatred of humanity is so thick and viscous you could drizzle it over pancakes and eat it up.

Boomer: who would I want to love?
Slambang to the chief. Mmmm. Anvillicious.

Eeeee! John Hodgeman awesomeness! He totally had the aura of a fanboy having his dreams come true and it was a kick to see.

Who was Daniel?! Gah!

Obvious: Cavil is a cold bastard.

Poor Galactica, old girl.

I don't know but I have this bad feeling about Anders' surgery--maybe it's because he hadn't had this much screen time since last year.

Yay, Boomer got a backbone!

Nurse needs to learn some bedside manner.

I would say Adama needs to ease up on the liver abuse, but there's only a handful of eps. left, so who cares!



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TV Thoughts: BSG "Blood on the Scales"

Previously on BSG: Aaaaargh! There be mutiny!

"Blood on the Scales"

(This ep. was written by Michael Angeli, so there's a 50/50 chance it could psychoanalyze itself into suckitude, but I have hope since the previews looked nice and action-y.)

Hey, it's Kelly, who was last seen getting all on sabatoge-y on Galactica's ass!

Dude, Adama could pwn your ass six ways to Sunday, Felix.

And Romo Lampkin makes an appearance--wouldn't be an Angeli episode without him, and looking about 25% less crazy than the last time we saw him.

Awesome line: Adama to Felix: "Shove it up your ass." If only all arguments could be solved that way...

Looks like foppish Sagitaron rep. grew a backbone too late. Nasty business, this civil war.

Hi, Feelix's latent idealism! Long time since we've seen you.

Awesome lines 2 ans 3: "I'm too frakkin' tired to get up, so why don't you just shoot me." and "I'm just a machine? What does that make you, dumbass?" Both by Chief, because he's starting to be awesome again.

Yay, Helo's conscious!

Oh noes, Anders!

More magical cylon transdpondster tech--what will they reveal next.

Lampkin decides to help Kara and not-dead-yet Anders--like you couldn't see that coming from across the fleet. Thanks for not letting me down, Angeli.

No one writes anvillicious self-awareness like Angeli. At least he shifts characters each time, with Gaius being this week's verbal victim.

Tricia Helfer looks pretty bangin'--as Jonathan Antin would say--with the Hollywood hippy hair.

Chief in the bowels of the ship--I know there's some kind of deep metaphor or something but my brain is too mushy to come up with one.

When are you going to learn Tom, not to piss off Laura to the point where she gets trigger happy? Honestly, have you not seen this show?

The ad for the Cylon detector iPhone app: I may have to download that.

Felix has done so much mental waffling that you could drizzle sweet grade A maple syrup all over it. mmmmm.

Awesome line: "I just hope that one day people will know what I was." Oh Felix, has there ever been a more meta line on this show?!

Felix finally lets go of his anger and his stump stops hurting--oh the levels you bring to the drama, Angeli.

Of course Zarek and Felix had to get ded, there would be no end if they didn't. I'm just sad to see them die because while what they did ended up being all kinds of bad for the survival of the fleet, they actually were grounded--at least Felix was, maybe Zarek not so much--in correct principles. It's too bad things had to end the way they did, but it wouldn't be BSG if at least one known and semi-beloved character didn't get deep sixed every so often.

As far as Angeli episodes go, this was one of the better ones. This is mostly because the plot dictated lots of ass-kicking action, leaving precious little time for dithering and obvious introspection, something Angeli seems to have a huge boner for but for which he lacks the necessary nuance to carry off much of the time. Of course, this is just my opinion as one of a million BSG fans who are also internet jackasses.


Also at LJ