Below the cut are my initial initial thoughts on the episode followed by a few less hysterical observations. I've since had a bit of time to digest, read some other people's reactions, and I have a few more thoughts. But I wanted to preserve what I first typed.
And so, SPOILERS AFOOT for Torchwood: Children of Earth episode 4 as soon as I perfect my sexy packin' heat strut.
Don't know if this counts as spoilers for Torchwood: Children of Earth episode 4, don't care--right now, I'm whack-a-mole with my emotions.
I can't even......just......I don't even know where to.......GOD!
Why?!
I have you so much right now, RTD. So effing much.
Can't even form a coherent thought.
I NEED to know how this all turns out...
...dammit!!!!!!
Okay, now for some more coherent thoughts:
One of the first things that stuck in my mind were the many shots of Ianto in his waistcoat. Mmmmmm... Is there a such thing as sartorial porn, with a subcategory of waistcoat fetishes? Because, dude....WIN.
I loved Ianto's convo with his sister and how he said he even kinda like Johnny now. Heh.
I kinda dig Lois now, because while she did do what needed to be done, at least her reaction and pants-pissing angst while screwing up the nerve to step up were well played and not all gung ho and annoyingly Mary Sue-ish like I was afraid of.
The whole sequence of the bigwigs discussing how many and which children to sacrifice was disturbing and disgusting.
It was sad to see Clem die, but in the wake of Ianto, I can't really care too much.
The ending scene of the episode was sad and tragic and beautifully played by Eve and John.
There's this part of me that insists that Ianto can be saved somehow--it's stupid, but I refuse to give up all hope until I see the final episode tomorrow. I think part of my distress comes from the fact that his death came so soon episode-wise after Tosh and Owen, even if in the timeline of the show much more time has passed. It still feels like piling shit on top of more shit. And of course there the Jack/Ianto shipper-ness in there too, but it's more than that. I just love the character of Ianto to pieces, and to have him gone form the show would be a real shame.
Also at LJ.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
"Just buying essentials...let's not forget the creature comforts. Coffee, obviously..."
TENSE music is tense!
SPOILERS AHEAD for Torchwood: Children of Earth episode 3 just as soon as I get a cup of Ianto's coffee--because it is THAT essential:
A litany of the AWESOME and possibly questionable:
Torchwood: guns, pen knife, laptop (dead), credit cards and phone (traceable), stamps, pair of contact lenses, fifteen quid, plus twenty-five pence
Heh, Rhys getting pissed that Jack knew first--so obvz and telegraphed, but still so funny.
"So one day you'll see me die of old age, and you'll just keep going." Oh Ianto, I want to pet you right now... (and I love his thoughtful/speculative face)
"It should take about twenty minutes--" "Thirty minutes." "--Thirty." And then foiled by Rhys and his beans!
I realize it's pretty preposterous--but in the realm of preposterous things, this is one of the lesser offenses--that Ianto would be able to get, like, an identical greatcoat for Jack, but so NOT CARING about that! Or about Ianto's new pinstripe three-piece. Because the power of the PRITTY and God compels me!
"I mean what's it gonna be, like a spaceship?" "What are you doing in Camden" Oh, Andy. *hug*
I applaud Ianto's brother-in-law's entrepreneurial spirit, but dude...I bet you could have charged 20 quid a kid!
"and who's the queer?" "OI! It's not 1965 anymore." "Queer, I can smell it."
Only on Torchwood: sexy time shenanigans with top-secret contact lenses.
The whole not really seeing the 456 is getting very M. Night Shamylan--not exactly a compliment.
A question for the modern age: smileys, Y/N?
"No. I gave 'em the kids...1965, I gave them twelve children...as a gift." WTF?!?!?!?!?!
Also at LJ.
SPOILERS AHEAD for Torchwood: Children of Earth episode 3 just as soon as I get a cup of Ianto's coffee--because it is THAT essential:
A litany of the AWESOME and possibly questionable:
Torchwood: guns, pen knife, laptop (dead), credit cards and phone (traceable), stamps, pair of contact lenses, fifteen quid, plus twenty-five pence
Heh, Rhys getting pissed that Jack knew first--so obvz and telegraphed, but still so funny.
"So one day you'll see me die of old age, and you'll just keep going." Oh Ianto, I want to pet you right now... (and I love his thoughtful/speculative face)
"It should take about twenty minutes--" "Thirty minutes." "--Thirty." And then foiled by Rhys and his beans!
I realize it's pretty preposterous--but in the realm of preposterous things, this is one of the lesser offenses--that Ianto would be able to get, like, an identical greatcoat for Jack, but so NOT CARING about that! Or about Ianto's new pinstripe three-piece. Because the power of the PRITTY and God compels me!
"I mean what's it gonna be, like a spaceship?" "What are you doing in Camden" Oh, Andy. *hug*
I applaud Ianto's brother-in-law's entrepreneurial spirit, but dude...I bet you could have charged 20 quid a kid!
"and who's the queer?" "OI! It's not 1965 anymore." "Queer, I can smell it."
Only on Torchwood: sexy time shenanigans with top-secret contact lenses.
The whole not really seeing the 456 is getting very M. Night Shamylan--not exactly a compliment.
A question for the modern age: smileys, Y/N?
"No. I gave 'em the kids...1965, I gave them twelve children...as a gift." WTF?!?!?!?!?!
Also at LJ.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
"Have you got the penknife?" "Rhys, you are not eating uncooked potatoes!" "We need it to get out!"
Just a few brain dribbles before I go to bed.
SPOILERS ARE COMING! For Torchwood: Children of Earth episode 2:
Badassery, thy face is Gwen.
I'd like to order a Rhys of my very own, kthnx!
Even all artfully dusted up, no one works a three-piece like Ianto Jones.
Gwen telling Rhys about the baby while in a lorry full of potatoes was just the thing to about break me--and his reaction and all of that was a big mushy ball of why I love this show so much.
I hope they tread carefully with the Lois character (Plucky New Assistant) because I want to like her but not if they make her l33t hax0rz skllz and shove it down our throats.
I repeat, Gwen is AWESOME.
For someone who was buried alive in concrete, Jack emerged looking quite alright. Mmmmm, ass shot....
...and that he takes the coat Gwen give him and just slings it over his shoulder and she's all "not looking there now". Bah!
Also at LJ.
SPOILERS ARE COMING! For Torchwood: Children of Earth episode 2:
Badassery, thy face is Gwen.
I'd like to order a Rhys of my very own, kthnx!
Even all artfully dusted up, no one works a three-piece like Ianto Jones.
Gwen telling Rhys about the baby while in a lorry full of potatoes was just the thing to about break me--and his reaction and all of that was a big mushy ball of why I love this show so much.
I hope they tread carefully with the Lois character (Plucky New Assistant) because I want to like her but not if they make her l33t hax0rz skllz and shove it down our throats.
I repeat, Gwen is AWESOME.
For someone who was buried alive in concrete, Jack emerged looking quite alright. Mmmmm, ass shot....
...and that he takes the coat Gwen give him and just slings it over his shoulder and she's all "not looking there now". Bah!
Also at LJ.
Apparently South Dakots is a massive dead zone with cow poo in it.
A couple thought on the new Sci Fi--I'm sorry, Syfy, because then maybe they'll fool people who aren't nerds into watching their network--series Warehouse 13:
CCH Punder is made of awesome. She can deliver lines like "How'd you get in here?" "Through the door." with such stone-cold bad-assery that it makes anything sound good.
Why is it that of the intrepid artifact-finding duo, it's always the girl who is the humourless pusbag? In this case, it's lady Secret Service Agent Mika. Partnered with just-quirky-enough Pete. I kind of had higher expectations since I saw this was co-created by Jane Espenson. Here's hoping this situation improves in future episodes.
More Saul Rubinek!
The steampunkiness of the secret warehouse office is pretty awesome, as are the gadgets they use to retrieve the weekly Maguffins. The pilot featured what was billed as a Tesla-designed stun gun and 2-way video communicators that looked like they dated back to the '40s. All glass and brass and wood and awesome looking.
Overall, I enjoyed the pilot enough for me to want to give it a chance. I like the interplay between the three main characters. My only concern is that they might get too dependent on the artifact/Maguffin-of-the-week formula at the expense of continuing story arcs, but I think with Jane Espenson involved there will be enough interesting character developments and snappy dialogue to keep my attention for awhile yet.
Also at LJ
CCH Punder is made of awesome. She can deliver lines like "How'd you get in here?" "Through the door." with such stone-cold bad-assery that it makes anything sound good.
Why is it that of the intrepid artifact-finding duo, it's always the girl who is the humourless pusbag? In this case, it's lady Secret Service Agent Mika. Partnered with just-quirky-enough Pete. I kind of had higher expectations since I saw this was co-created by Jane Espenson. Here's hoping this situation improves in future episodes.
More Saul Rubinek!
The steampunkiness of the secret warehouse office is pretty awesome, as are the gadgets they use to retrieve the weekly Maguffins. The pilot featured what was billed as a Tesla-designed stun gun and 2-way video communicators that looked like they dated back to the '40s. All glass and brass and wood and awesome looking.
Overall, I enjoyed the pilot enough for me to want to give it a chance. I like the interplay between the three main characters. My only concern is that they might get too dependent on the artifact/Maguffin-of-the-week formula at the expense of continuing story arcs, but I think with Jane Espenson involved there will be enough interesting character developments and snappy dialogue to keep my attention for awhile yet.
Also at LJ
Monday, July 6, 2009
"Heh, 'you two'...it's all a bit new to me, that's all--laser saw?"
SPOILERS AHOY!! for Torchwood: Children of Earth episode 1
Like I said on Facebook, this was a concentrated dose of all the AWESOME that Torchwood creates when they're not doing episodes that are Weevil Fight Club episodes.
Forthwith, a partial list of AWESOME:
1. Jack and Ianto being all cute and "Now who's calling us a couple?" "You are." "No, you are."
2. Gwen, like the whole episode. Awesome all around, but especially when she's driving across the Severn Bridge and talking to Rhys and when she finds out she's preggers.
3. Rhys! Because he's awesome just by being there.
4. The picture of Tosh and Owen at Gwen's work station, because it was a lovely moment when Gwen said "Good morning" to it and to know that she was slowly getting past that horrific time.
5. Ianto, when he wasn't getting the car stolen. I want to know how those people were able to steal it, since Ianto isn't stupid like Owen and leaves the keys in the ignition. Anyways, Ianto! Being all awkward with his sister and her prying it out of him that he's with Jack.
6. Not necessarily AWESOME, but interesting, that Jack has an adult child, who's not all warm Hallmark greetings toward dear old Dad. Yeah, more like AWKWARD. But that's something I'd love to know more about.
7. Teh hot kissing action before EXPLOSIONZZZZZZ TEIM!!!
Finally, the one thing that was NOT AWESOME:
When Plucky New Assistant wants to know what Torchwood is, she gets an info page that looks like something out of Wikipedia, but not so close as to infringe copyright:
Like, how original, British Government. Why is it on TV and in movies they always insist on dummin' it down by making these computer screen shots RLY OBVS with headings like "Super Sekrit Government Sekrits" or hopelessly lame like "Government Information Network". Yes, yes, I realize this is a nitpick on the level with Comic Book Guy insults but it still stuck out at me to a ridiculous degree.
Okay, that's all for tonight. Only.....22 hours until the next fix!!
Also at LJ.
Like I said on Facebook, this was a concentrated dose of all the AWESOME that Torchwood creates when they're not doing episodes that are Weevil Fight Club episodes.
Forthwith, a partial list of AWESOME:
1. Jack and Ianto being all cute and "Now who's calling us a couple?" "You are." "No, you are."
2. Gwen, like the whole episode. Awesome all around, but especially when she's driving across the Severn Bridge and talking to Rhys and when she finds out she's preggers.
3. Rhys! Because he's awesome just by being there.
4. The picture of Tosh and Owen at Gwen's work station, because it was a lovely moment when Gwen said "Good morning" to it and to know that she was slowly getting past that horrific time.
5. Ianto, when he wasn't getting the car stolen. I want to know how those people were able to steal it, since Ianto isn't stupid like Owen and leaves the keys in the ignition. Anyways, Ianto! Being all awkward with his sister and her prying it out of him that he's with Jack.
6. Not necessarily AWESOME, but interesting, that Jack has an adult child, who's not all warm Hallmark greetings toward dear old Dad. Yeah, more like AWKWARD. But that's something I'd love to know more about.
7. Teh hot kissing action before EXPLOSIONZZZZZZ TEIM!!!
Finally, the one thing that was NOT AWESOME:
When Plucky New Assistant wants to know what Torchwood is, she gets an info page that looks like something out of Wikipedia, but not so close as to infringe copyright:
Like, how original, British Government. Why is it on TV and in movies they always insist on dummin' it down by making these computer screen shots RLY OBVS with headings like "Super Sekrit Government Sekrits" or hopelessly lame like "Government Information Network". Yes, yes, I realize this is a nitpick on the level with Comic Book Guy insults but it still stuck out at me to a ridiculous degree.
Okay, that's all for tonight. Only.....22 hours until the next fix!!
Also at LJ.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Where's my Chef Lonely Hearts for One and chocolate for three?
So there I was at C3 on Saturday, wearing my Frakkin' Toaster shirt and Greg asks why I'm single when there are plenty of equally nerdy fish in the sea. The inner love-lorn 13-year-old in me wanted to blurt out "Because you already have a girlfriend!"
Sigh.
I feel socially inept at an epic level.
I'm going to die alone (since my hatred of cats precludes me from CCL status).
Also at LJ
Sigh.
I feel socially inept at an epic level.
I'm going to die alone (since my hatred of cats precludes me from CCL status).
Also at LJ
Sunday, May 3, 2009
TV Review: Dante's Cove (season 1)
"Oh, this is awful. This is nasty. I've got to brush my teeth after this."
--Toby, Dante's Cove (In The Beginning)
Oh Toby, you have no idea how meta that really is.
I'm in a serious funk at the moment. No job + no immediate prospects that don't involve food service + shitty economy + dwindling savings = me on my couch on Friday afternoon feeling a pity party for 1 coming on.
Read on for my thoughts about the hot mess that is Dante's Cove just as soon as I get some lukewarm beer from the haunted cellar.
So I'm watching Dante's Cove season 1 through Netflix--don't ask, it's a long and boring story that wouldn't interest anyone, including me--and it is bad. Like, mind-bogglingly, cringe-inducingly, eye-gougingly, ear-bleedingy bad. BAD. I get that with these kinds of campy soapy melodramas that plots aren't supposed to makes sense, the acting isn't supposed to be award-worthy--I get that. I have appreciated many shows that are complete and utter shit (90% of SoapNet/LMN programming comes to mind). Dante's Cove, however, elevates shitty TV to a level never before seen on my 32" high-def screen. And I can't get enough of it. Is part of that because of the gratuitous boy!sex? Yes. I can't lie about that. It seems that for most of the running time the plot is merely a series of porny set pieces strung together with insipid dialog delivered by wooden actors in some vague semblance of "story". And there's girl/girl and boy/girl thrown in there too--sex for everybody! Even the recently re-corporealized (explanation further down).
The gist of it is: in ye olden tymes in Dante's Cove this witch lady was engaged to a dude (Ambrosious), but one day she finds him boffing the help--the male help--and curses him (by making him look old! Gasp! The cliche curse of every gay man, according to TV) and locks him in the basement. To break the curse, he has to get a hot young man to kiss him. Fast forward to present day (2005) where we meet Toby and Kevin, two crazy kids just having sex on the beach who go to Dante's Cove where Toby works. Kevin, poor stupid Kevin, goes down to the very same basement where Ambrosious is still locked up, and Ambrosious manages to get Kevin to kiss him. Then apparently he can get his boner serviced by Keivn whenever he wants. Or something. Again, logic and plot are only passing acquaintances here. Toby finds out about the curse and is sad, or what passes for sad on this show. Which is more along the lines of frowning a lot and crackling his voice to convey "distress". Toby: master thespian he is not.
There is only one character in the entire series that acts remotely like a normal person and has an emotional range wider than "horny" and "confused": Van, the friendly local lesbian Wicca enthusiast/craptastic painter. She's pretty fuckin' awesome and comes through to save the day (or does she?! Dun-dun-duuuuun!). The two male leads, Kevin and Toby, well....what's to say that's not a string of expletives peppered in with assorted nouns, articles, and the fact that sex is the only thing they can do even semi-believably. Oh dear. Kevin isn't even really that good of a piece of eye candy; he has a square head, horribly trashy highlights, and the fact that he can't cry believably in a soap opera is one of the cardinal sins of televised melodrama. And he can't act. Toby is prettier, but his hair is like an oil slick, his voice has only two main inflections (moderate annoyance and moderate confusion), and his crying sucks only about 15% less than Kevin's. And he can't act.
And then there's Ambrosious. Where to begin with that hot mess. Perhaps with the accent of a thousand origins--is it English? Welsh? Australian? South African? South Carolinian??? We don't know?!?!?!? His hair is an affront to the visual center of the brain too. Likie, does the dude have stock in Dep, because he must have been single-handedly keeping them in business while filming this. Blech. As with pretty much everyone else, he couldn't believably act his way out of a community theater production of "Our Town"; add to that his face, which is an advertisement for everything that's wrong about plastic surgery (no white man has lips that full without a little help), and you get me itching to fast-forward through every scene he's in. And since the first 15 minutes of it heavily feature him and the cougar-lady-witch bitch, I'm amazed I didn't shut it off and put it in the mailbox without finishing.
Plot holes you could steer the Queen Mary through, wretched student-film level editing (you know it's bad when you can notice the editing), dialog that's only dialog in the sense that the characters say words--not that it means anything or has any punch or zing or moves the plot along at any other speed that glacial, "stormy" special effects that wouldn't be out of place on a Vincent Price-esque Halloween special. It's an epic level of badness that I don't think I've ever seen in all my years of watching TV. Ever.
I already pushed season 2 and 3 to the top of my queue.
Also at LJ
--Toby, Dante's Cove (In The Beginning)
Oh Toby, you have no idea how meta that really is.
I'm in a serious funk at the moment. No job + no immediate prospects that don't involve food service + shitty economy + dwindling savings = me on my couch on Friday afternoon feeling a pity party for 1 coming on.
Read on for my thoughts about the hot mess that is Dante's Cove just as soon as I get some lukewarm beer from the haunted cellar.
So I'm watching Dante's Cove season 1 through Netflix--don't ask, it's a long and boring story that wouldn't interest anyone, including me--and it is bad. Like, mind-bogglingly, cringe-inducingly, eye-gougingly, ear-bleedingy bad. BAD. I get that with these kinds of campy soapy melodramas that plots aren't supposed to makes sense, the acting isn't supposed to be award-worthy--I get that. I have appreciated many shows that are complete and utter shit (90% of SoapNet/LMN programming comes to mind). Dante's Cove, however, elevates shitty TV to a level never before seen on my 32" high-def screen. And I can't get enough of it. Is part of that because of the gratuitous boy!sex? Yes. I can't lie about that. It seems that for most of the running time the plot is merely a series of porny set pieces strung together with insipid dialog delivered by wooden actors in some vague semblance of "story". And there's girl/girl and boy/girl thrown in there too--sex for everybody! Even the recently re-corporealized (explanation further down).
The gist of it is: in ye olden tymes in Dante's Cove this witch lady was engaged to a dude (Ambrosious), but one day she finds him boffing the help--the male help--and curses him (by making him look old! Gasp! The cliche curse of every gay man, according to TV) and locks him in the basement. To break the curse, he has to get a hot young man to kiss him. Fast forward to present day (2005) where we meet Toby and Kevin, two crazy kids just having sex on the beach who go to Dante's Cove where Toby works. Kevin, poor stupid Kevin, goes down to the very same basement where Ambrosious is still locked up, and Ambrosious manages to get Kevin to kiss him. Then apparently he can get his boner serviced by Keivn whenever he wants. Or something. Again, logic and plot are only passing acquaintances here. Toby finds out about the curse and is sad, or what passes for sad on this show. Which is more along the lines of frowning a lot and crackling his voice to convey "distress". Toby: master thespian he is not.
There is only one character in the entire series that acts remotely like a normal person and has an emotional range wider than "horny" and "confused": Van, the friendly local lesbian Wicca enthusiast/craptastic painter. She's pretty fuckin' awesome and comes through to save the day (or does she?! Dun-dun-duuuuun!). The two male leads, Kevin and Toby, well....what's to say that's not a string of expletives peppered in with assorted nouns, articles, and the fact that sex is the only thing they can do even semi-believably. Oh dear. Kevin isn't even really that good of a piece of eye candy; he has a square head, horribly trashy highlights, and the fact that he can't cry believably in a soap opera is one of the cardinal sins of televised melodrama. And he can't act. Toby is prettier, but his hair is like an oil slick, his voice has only two main inflections (moderate annoyance and moderate confusion), and his crying sucks only about 15% less than Kevin's. And he can't act.
And then there's Ambrosious. Where to begin with that hot mess. Perhaps with the accent of a thousand origins--is it English? Welsh? Australian? South African? South Carolinian??? We don't know?!?!?!? His hair is an affront to the visual center of the brain too. Likie, does the dude have stock in Dep, because he must have been single-handedly keeping them in business while filming this. Blech. As with pretty much everyone else, he couldn't believably act his way out of a community theater production of "Our Town"; add to that his face, which is an advertisement for everything that's wrong about plastic surgery (no white man has lips that full without a little help), and you get me itching to fast-forward through every scene he's in. And since the first 15 minutes of it heavily feature him and the cougar-lady-witch bitch, I'm amazed I didn't shut it off and put it in the mailbox without finishing.
Plot holes you could steer the Queen Mary through, wretched student-film level editing (you know it's bad when you can notice the editing), dialog that's only dialog in the sense that the characters say words--not that it means anything or has any punch or zing or moves the plot along at any other speed that glacial, "stormy" special effects that wouldn't be out of place on a Vincent Price-esque Halloween special. It's an epic level of badness that I don't think I've ever seen in all my years of watching TV. Ever.
I already pushed season 2 and 3 to the top of my queue.
Also at LJ
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